Sales pitch typos from across the nation
What’s That Smell?
“Garage has n odoor” (So do your feet, but I wouldn’t consider that a selling point.)
“Mouton home” (Now we know where Mary’s Little Lambs disappeared to.)
“Wow assking” (Whispered Snoop to Ice T when he spotted the colossal a__ on Ice’s wife..)
“Hosting multiple peeviews this weekend” (Groaned one urinal to the other in the men’s restroom at Gold’s Gym.)
“Compound is divided into three arenas” (That explains the elephant crap on your shoe.)
Did Something Die In Here?
“Bull in cabnets” (Said the nervous wife while trying to explain the naked matador cowering under the covers.)
“Dog camel in back” (Man’s best dromedary…)
“Overlooks UCLA compass” (Odd selling point from someone whose career is obviously heading in the wrong direction
“No smacking on proverty” (Oh please – can I hit you upside the head just once?)
“Call re snowings” (Another Saturday night at the Lohan residence.)
The Menagerie May Be The Problem
“Dryer needs new duck” (Who gets the bill?)
“Tambourine trees in yard” (Another listing from Peter, Paul and Mary of Puff Realty, Inc.)
“Gorgeous cut grass fixtures” (That’s great if you want a hay-lo light effect.)
“Like Faceback?” (Of course, but I can’t afford a cosmetic surgeon.)
“Want Jan close!!!” (If Jan is your wife, she should take out a restraining order.)
No, It Was Your Hot Air All Along
“This is spanking you” (This is me calling the cops.)
That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: spell well and sell!